Safe for Work Porn?

I think this video is safe for work.

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Gifts

What is the protocol on wedding gifts? Do you really have a year to get someone a wedding gift? ...Continue reading "Gifts"....

Veet Prez

Sarah Palin, WHAT???????????????????
HAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ...Continue reading "Veet Prez"....

Bust out the Zubaz!

While hanging out at my buddy's place watching some of the Olympics, my friend and I engaged in a heated debate as to when you are allowed to wear a individual player's sports jersey. Obviously the discussion was centered around people of high school age and older. Also, it did not include any discussion of women in jerseys (of any age) because women with sports jerseys are always hot, even a pink McNabb jersey gets me excited.

Well, according to my friend, you are NEVER allowd to wear a jersey if you are amale above the age of 13. NEVER! When I informed him of his moron status he acquiesed a bit and made the concession that when attending a sporting event you are allowed to wear a team or player's jersey only at that event, he even suggested that one should take the jersey of after the game. Obviously his set of guidelines are completely off base.

A more appropriate measure of when an adult male is allowed to wear a jersey is:

1) Never to a club, bar, lounge or in a night time social setting,
2) Allowed when doing chores around the house which includes shovelling the snow and mowing the lawn and all roofing procedures,
3) Obviously allowed at ANY sporting event no matter who is playing, for example if you can go to a Steelers game you can wear a Joe Montana jersey (you might get kicked in the back of the head, but still). Sporting events include watching the game at your own home on DirectTV, or your friend's place while watching the Super Bowl. BUt does not include your company picnic where you play volleyball and horse shoes. I know you were thinking it! ...Continue reading "Bust out the Zubaz!"....

Facials . . . . . . No, Not That Kind!

Yesterday was my birthday and my fiance surprised me with a coupon to get a facial at a very nice day spa. I was pleasantly surprised, I mean we have been together for awhile and was therefore expecting socks or underwear or something (no, we are not in a rut already)! Well, after wlaking ina nd the chuckling died down, I went into some back room where a very attractive women told me to take off my shirt and get under the sheets and relax.

Well, while in a heated bed, naked from the top up, having a beautiful women with soft, supple hands caressing my face, shoulders and arms, I quickly realized there is no way I could relax. And one of the many thoughts that was running through my head was, would this be a more relaxing experience if the women giving me the facial was not so hot. I mean I kept contorting my face in order for her to see my better side and she was therefore unable to relax at all. Also, the whole time I kept thinking that I needed to tip this woman extra because she was attractive. If she was not so, I really would not have cared what she thought of me or if I tipped her at all. Why do men always get uncomfortable around very attractive strangers? I mean I bought $50 in exfoliating after shave balm, WHAT???? ...Continue reading "Facials . . . . . . No, Not That Kind!"....

Ya Ya YUCK!

What excuse do I give my fiance when she invariably asks to go see that Travelling Pants movie? ...Continue reading "Ya Ya YUCK!"....

Why do we Hate our Sports

What is it about sports, sportstars, and everyone and thing that is associated with sports including mascots, agents (sometimes one in the same) and referees that gets us so worked up. I mean the Vikings were nervous about trading for Jared Allen because he had 3 DUI's and once instantly branded as a "character issue guy." I mean the one DUI was in Idaho and the other two were in Kansas, I mean come on. Shia LaBeouf on the other hand at the tender age of 22, was arrested early in the morning for misdemeanor criminal trespassing in a Chicago Walgreens after refusing to leave when asked by a security guard. Then an arrest warrant was issued for LaBeouf after he failed to turn up to a court appearance. The hearing was in relation to a ticket he received for unlawful smoking in Burbank, California. And then again recently authorities arrested LaBeouf on misdemeanor drunk driving charges in Los Angeles.

Despite the transgressions of these two public figures, only Allen is looked upon on as a bad character guy, while the only negative tings we have to say about Shia is that he is the biggest asshole for getting to kiss Megan Fox, talk about overvaluing one's worth.

Which leads me to another tandem and their reputations that I just do not understand, Tim Donaghy vs. Martha Stewart. Tim Donaghy was sentenced to 15 months in federal court where he faced 33 months and was given credit for his cooperation with federal authorities. Donaghy has been branded as a rogue, greedy, compulsive, diseased person that brought shame upon the NBA, and most shockingly that his sentence was too light. REALLY! Ok - Donaghy comitted his crime for a measly $2,000 which was later upped all the way to a whopping $5,000 per pick.

Martha Stewart who had such a dramatic fall after her release from jail in March of 2005 that her Martha Stewart line at KMart has been expanded (ok, well that was a bad example), she has products sold in Sears stores, has her own TV show called The Martha Stewart Show which was nominated for 6 Emmys, and a TV show that is an adaptation of The Apprentice. This does not include her many cameos in shows like Ugly Betty, the Today Show, etc. She also has her own Sirius radio show and has incredible brand equity that reaches from books, wines, to home building. But let us examine how many people Martha Stewart, the martyr of all white collar business women, effected and by effected I mean SCREWED OVER!

Martha Stewart illegally used insider information to sell nearly 4000 shares of ImClone a day before the FDA had a negative ruling on an ImClone product. She was able to avoid a loss of $46,000. The charges levied against her included; conspiracy, obstruction of an agency proceeding, and making false statements to federal investigators and was sentenced to 5 MONTHS!!!! Justice, where - definitely not in the realm of public opinion! ...Continue reading "Why do we Hate our Sports"....